Allo Allo Allo What Do We Have 'ere Then
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Allo, allo, allo, what's going on here then Lady Boy?

The Spanish, swings both ways, front man was stopped by a friendly PC the other day.

You decide what's being said, and write your comments below .

Email Bluekipper at

Email Bluekipper at

Comments about Allo Allo Allo What Do We Have 'ere Then
Leave him alone you blue bully's. If he had any balls he would love to play at your great club
torres tart with testes, australia, 6:21 AM 2/09/2010
i was rushing off to spurs to play with young boys!
bobverd, everton, 5:57 PM 17/08/2010
Excuse me Miss. Can you blow into this please
Terry, Smith, 12:52 PM 17/08/2010
Right then ya little cheating shit. I know you were only doing 28mph but I'm still gonna give ya a ticket coz i fuckin hate ya, ya fuckin ladyboy..!! COYB
Pete, Runcorn, 12:52 PM 16/08/2010
Shit, first the subs bench, now the magistrate's bench, the next thing will be the park bench.
John B, Little Sutton, 2:44 AM 16/08/2010
Excuse me miss, this is a mans car, i sugest you stick to the fiesta.
Peter D, Netherley, 12:53 AM 16/08/2010
Your under arrest for playing for liverpool and being a ladyboy
Jack Prescott, shropshire, 3:27 PM 15/08/2010
Anything George Michael can do, i can better it officer!!
karlos, everton, 1:51 PM 15/08/2010
Dont panic "Nando" its only me "Howard Webb", I'll only give you 3pts when I ref your lot.
nm, Everton Lpool6, 11:07 AM 15/08/2010
But orificer, it's our year ... we've turned the corner, we have the final piece of the jigsaw... it was some big Chelsea fans who did it and ran away... our fans will hold a protest march and sing songs at an empty football ground...
Derek, Wirral, 10:27 AM 15/08/2010
allo allo allo trying to get away from me a, well you never got far did you i know idd find you some day said the imigration officer
liamefc1, liverpool, 2:41 AM 15/08/2010
Torres found at last, been missing in 90mins action for long time
phil, golborne, 11:15 PM 14/08/2010
"But you said blow on this, I have heard that old rumour that if you suck on some copper it gets you off when being breathalised, I misunderstood senor!!!
Andy Savage, Croxteth, 9:07 PM 14/08/2010
3 Points!? I must inform Woy! He'll be delighted!
jonny, cheshire, 8:12 PM 14/08/2010
Is my reputation still intact?
bobverd, everton , 6:56 PM 14/08/2010
Segnor Fernando this is not a traffic ticket, it´s an Interpol order of arrest for the diving against Chile in South-Africa last June. Shame on you, nignotorres, and take off the blue cloth of your plate please
Juan Foxley, Chile, 4:59 PM 14/08/2010
no officer i havent broken down, i was just dogging.
Danny, crocky, 4:59 PM 14/08/2010
Oooooh! I love a man in a uniform
Robin, Wolves, 12:20 PM 14/08/2010
"OK, it's a date then and of course I will be bringing the truncheon sweetheart!"
jroc, Wavertree, 11:57 AM 14/08/2010
Torres: Please officer, I've just won the world cup! Bizzie: I'm Dutch, now get in the f..kin' van!!!
Tom Davies, Liverpool, 12:22 AM 14/08/2010
but Stevie G said if I give him a blowjob he'd tell you guys I've done my duty
Paul, Surrey, 10:44 PM 13/08/2010
which ways stamford bridge again ?
r smith, liverpool, 9:16 PM 13/08/2010
Officer: Name? Ladyboy: Torres, I play for Liverpool. Officer: They've got a Torres in the girls team too?!
Phil Thompson, Blackpool, 7:11 PM 13/08/2010
Now then you 'orrible little gobshite.Call yerself a red do yer la?Then explain the BLUE reg plate and lack of numbers.Yer nicked.
Big Tommy, Illegal Gobshite heaven, 7:07 PM 13/08/2010
officer;why r u in a rush mrs torres.mrs torres;im rushing home to change my tampax officer
t.murphy, kirkby, 5:47 PM 13/08/2010
Im a copper but your a red shite, your hated more than me so il left you off with £50,000 fine this time ballbag !!!!
franki, ellesmere port, 2:48 PM 13/08/2010
Sorry orificer,ooh I mean officer.I was looking for a new house in the area and decided to go cottaging.
blue brim, e-port, 1:58 PM 13/08/2010
...and i shall adress this ticket to jagielka's pocket.
scott, london, 1:52 PM 13/08/2010
Didn't think you could catch me officer! Is your name Jagielka?
terry, worcs, 1:44 PM 13/08/2010
officer plod : you were shite in the world cup!
jay, childwall, 1:42 PM 13/08/2010
who do think you are mrs? the stig? Plus this car is stolen it belongs to a mr moyes.
Lee, wirral, 1:39 PM 13/08/2010
lets get this straight miss torres!your making a formal complaint against one m. arteta for being a better player than you?
razza, garston, 1:18 PM 13/08/2010
Oh please officer is there anything i can do for you, as i am the only gay in the village you know xxxxx
marty, Isle of Man, 1:13 PM 13/08/2010
You say you own this vehicle miss? Is that correct? If so, how could a girl like you possibly afford it? Did you sell your arse on the albert dock?
Mark EFC, Wrexham, 12:48 PM 13/08/2010
This is all very well madam, but I'd like you to explain why there's a picture of Bet Lynch on your licence.
Gigi, SA, 12:45 PM 13/08/2010
Look, right, You are not allowed to leave the City till you sign this, Woy says so! "I the undersigned do hereby pledge my future to the club (Liverpool FC) and promise to tell all the fans I did it of my own free will" Just sign it, or your going in a cell with Purple Aki! No you can''t request to be Carraghers Cell mate instead!
Jacko, Warrington, 12:37 PM 13/08/2010
I'm sure your Albert Dock customers can wait, can blow into this bag instead, madam ...
Rick, Halewood, 12:36 PM 13/08/2010
"Well Fernando, who'd have thought the boys in blue would be taking three points off you before the season had started hey!!?"
Ciaran, Allerton, 11:27 AM 13/08/2010
i said blow not suck, lets try that again miss!!!
chris obrien, liverpool, 11:10 AM 13/08/2010
Wow, you almost look like a man without that ugly red shirt on
Andy, Sweden, 10:25 AM 13/08/2010
I'll opt for court but I must caution you that I've got the same lawyer as Stevie Gerrard.
Steve, Wrexham, 9:40 AM 13/08/2010
tall for a bird you aren't ya.
Rich, Wavertree, 9:26 AM 13/08/2010
No really what is your name Miss
Ben Walker, Widnes, 8:54 AM 13/08/2010
officer: right then is it miss or mr on the ticket!!
arfon, nth wales, 8:46 AM 13/08/2010
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