The Derby week is upon us. So here are a few 'Derby Day Shouts'
* Picture the scene at Anfield in 95/96 When Kanchelskis scored 2, three of us were sitting in the kop, singin' and dancin' away a few minutes after we went 2-0 up. One kopite turned around and said: "Fuck off, you bitter Blues. When was the last time you scored two at Anfield?" Me mate replied straightaway: "About 5 minutes ago, you twat!" Classic. Michael Berrill
* The Kanchelskis Derby was beamed back to Goodison on the big screen. When the redshite went down 2-0 some disaffected redshite stood up and shouted: "Can't you change the fuckin channel on that thing? Baywatch is on the other side." To which a Blue replied without missing a beat: "Yeah, more tits in red." There is us and there is them.Willow.
* Lucas Leiva was over by the Bullens Road, when some fella stands up and yell's: "Fuck off Leiva your the worst Brazilian I've seen since David Blunkett shaved his missus". Absolute quality rant. Cheers Mike.
* At analfield in the kop, Everton fans were singing: "An if yer know yer history.." Some redshite says: "What history? You ain't got none." An Evertonian comes back with: "What you on about? We won the league on this ground before you existed." Even kopites were laughing.Toffeenose80.
* With his redshite brother in law, my Dad sees Ian St John and asks him: "Could you sign this 4 times?" St John duly signs four times. Then asks: "Why four times?" My Dad says: Well, I need four of yours to get one of Alex Young's." His brother in law was mortified, but St John burst out in hysterics. Paul, Bootle.
* Back in '93 - Sitting in the Gwladys Street, when the shite took the lead. Three redshites stood up and started singing and turning to the rest of the stands. Minutes later, Mo Johnson and then Beardo scored that cracking winner. After the Blue hoards had slightly quietened down, me 'arl fella shouts: "Where've the Beverly Sisters gone?" Cue general laughter and the slumped shoulders and further depressed air of the redshites. "Oh, I never felt more like singing the Blues, when Everton win and Liverpool lose.." BlueForEver
* When Sky TV was relatively new. You may remember the 'Sky Strikers' and the fireworks at full time. Well at half-time they had inflatable Everton and Liverpool sumo wrestlers in the semi-circle. Cue some fella: "Aye, aye, they're bringing on Jan Molby." Duncan Disorderly.
* Derby game at Goodison, half-time, massive queue for the gents, one RS pipes up: "You don't have to queue up for a piss at Anfield." Fella next to me replies in a flash: "Yeah, but you all sit down to piss over there." HM.
* Many years ago when we were on the kop, a redshite was waving a big brass bell, A blue shouted to him: "Eh, mate, sell your pies and fuck off home." David Evans.
* Derby at Anfield, another 0-0. Babb gets booked and my mate shouts: "The refs writing BABB and you know it's not his A-Level results." Jeff Hanlon.
* At the Carsley 1-0 win at Goodison, a fella stood up in the middle of the Gwladys and shouted: "Oh Liver, Liver!" At this point everyone was ready to jump him. He continued: "Liver, Liver, Liver, Liver sausage and mash." and sat down. The whole section erupted in laughter. Great day! Big Admhez.
Send your "Me 'arl Fella's Shouts" to: firstname.lastname@example.org
These 'Derby Day Shouts' were taken from over 400 shouts in The Blue Kipper book "Turning The Air Blue", which is back in print and available from the ASDA and all good book shops and some shit ones too.
Email Bluekipper at email@example.com
Email Bluekipper at firstname.lastname@example.org