Dear Santa Bill,
We've all been good Evertonians this (and every other) year, so could you please do the following for us -
1. It's as plain as the rather large nose on Phil Thompson's pug-ugly face, that King Louis Saha is one of the very best strikers in the Premier League. We are fortunate that he is playing for our club at this moment in time. However, as he is out of contract next summer and is free to sign, under the Bosman Ruling, for foreign clubs after the 1st January 2010, please, please, please instruct those responsible for contract negotiations to get their fingers out, and get Louis signed, sealed and delivered for OUR CLUB, well before that deadline arrives.
2. As we are still way short of numbers, please also pursue and tie up the initial loan signing of Landon Donovan from LA Galaxy.
Okay, we all know that he's played in Germany in the past, and it didn't work out, but this guy is a class act, as anyone who saw his recent performances in the Confederation Cup will testify. He is older now, and there is the added bonus for him of having the great Tim Howard already well established here. There's no doubt that Donovan would be an excellent signing for the Blues.
3. Please give Moyesy sufficient funds to at least shore up our meagre squad in the January transfer window. I know Harry Redknapp reckons that we have a bigger squad than Spurs, but he must be the only person in the football world who thinks that way. I wish I knew what Harry had been drinking before he made that statement - it must be damn good stuff!!
4. Finally, please sort out the Stadium issue. We're a big club, in a big city, and there must be suitable sites available, assuming you still don't wish to redevelop Goodison Park. We aren't in a small town which is strapped for development space, so surely it's not beyond the wit of all parties involved to get their collective heads together and sort it all out? As for the possibility of sharing a cess pit with the shite, I can only speak for myself in that I'd rather share hell with the devil!!
None of these requests are in any way outrageous, so PLEASE grant our wishes and bring some merriment into our Christmas, dear Santa Bill." Ronald Ragin'... (11/12/09)
Dear Santa Bill,