SEP
22
2011
Mickey Blue Eyes...
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ANUS HORRIBLUS

By

Mickey Blue Eyes

 

The home League Cup match with West Bromwich just about summed up where our team performances stand at the moment. In truth, the less said about the game the better: we were awful for eighty minutes of normal time, equalised at the death, and won it only narrowly in extra time. At least we were spared the ludicrous pantomime of a penalty shoot out. And we can console ourselves that our season has started better than last year. Scant compensation, I know, but any drifting straw will do as Moyesy rebuilds his team and squad.

 

It took us thirty five minutes to summon an attempt on goal, by which time the enemy had had four near misses and generally had command of play. When they went ahead with a second half penalty it was certainly deserved. Most of us simply sat there, chin in hands, eyes staring glassily at misplaced passes, spiritless play and the kind of incompetence you attribute to Colonel Blimp and your average spiv banker. Occasionally you felt somebody was going to invade the pitch and try to shake some enthusiasm out of them. You knew it wasn't going to be Moyesy because he had retreated into sulk-mode on the bench; you can tell things are bad when he makes only sporadic appearances at the dotted line and his body language is all sloped shoulders and hollow chest. Just after the penalty I got a text from Paul: "Not going the pub afterwards," which was precisely how I felt.

 

Felli's equaliser was quite out of keeping with the match, a masterly swivel and left foot ground shot, minimum back lift, left edge of the D. It was the culmination of our only ten minutes of "pressure" in normal time, and, funnily, we might even have won it before the final whistle when Jack the Lad had a clear heading chance which he naturally put wide. We did pick up in extra time, though, and gradually gained more of the play. Then Phil Neville - of all people! - got the winner with a fine shot after good dribbling and close control by Roy tight on the right goal line. Relatively speaking, Felli and Roy were our two best players on the night.

 

Afterwards, me, I couldn't wait to get home. I don't even want to think about playing Man Sitteh this weekend.

 

 

Comments about Anus Horriblus
13
Anyone would think we lost the game reading this doom and gloom article! We won and we won it with a team that's still finding its feet in a bizarre late preseason! Yes we are in a late preseason as we get our players in late and the team we trained in the actual preseason wasn't really ours now was it!? Not with the all the players sold! And I think we've got a lot to be cheerful about (providing we don’t watch the last game’s highlights!) We got Royston working his but cheeks off for badge and honour! And it's paying off with goals and an assist! I know it doesn’t look like it but we are actually kicking some lily ass at the moment!
Ian, Everton, 9:08 PM 22/09/2011
12
Apart from Villa we have played teams who haven't tried to play and been negative with 2 banks of 5. City will give us space and we may surprise people and play some good stuff. Admittedly we may get beat but we have some decent players who can hurt teams. Drenthe when fully fit link with Bainesy for a great left side. Vellios and Maguay look to be coming good. Coyb
Pab, Walton, 7:11 PM 22/09/2011
11
At least Mickey limited himself to 200 or so, more or less, focused, and well chosen words! I actually bothered reading it and that is a first (or rather a second)!!
Steve, Bloxham, 6:42 PM 22/09/2011
10
a win is a win and all in all results wise a decent start to the season, but the game last night and the ones before for me suggest, we will be involved in lots of tight games this season and like mbe eludes- luck is with us at present thankfully! but for how long? Put simply cos we have no one for the midfield to feed up top, we end up with loads of possession but no where to go with it. I always feel like I'm being negative about things recently but then after thought I'm just being realistic. I do genuinely think lots of fellow blues are just sheer optimists and are burying their heads in the sand. However I love the blues and always will so lets hope we improve starting with 3 points at city. COYBB
DJ, Wigan, 5:35 PM 22/09/2011
9
I agree up to a point with G man, however, even though we often seem to raise our game against the so-called bigger clubs I'd suggest that things need to improve or we'll be lucky to come away with 3 points out of the next five games..
Big H, Birkenhead, 5:16 PM 22/09/2011
8
Some people are never happy whether we win, lose or draw. Before the season started fans were not happy with the lack of spending in the transfer market. Then we all found out we've got less money than the Greeks and people vented their frustration. Selling Arteta with an hour left of the window was another mute point. I agree they were not the brightest of days but let's look at the positives. It's our best start to the league for about 5 years even though our performances have been below par. We are in the last 16 of the league cup despite being under par for 80 minutes or so. Things can only get better from here,when we have every body fit and up and running then we have got a good squad to work with. Be positive
Spudv, Liverpool, 5:05 PM 22/09/2011
7
This is the kind of negativity we don't need. We won. We're in the next round and were one step closer to actually winning something. If we stay positive it will rub off on the players eventually and the results will keep coming. We've got the talent in the squad, it's already a better start than last year so stop whining and start supporting!
Keith, Warrington, 4:45 PM 22/09/2011
6
A win's a win, and if your team can still play bad and grind out a win, it's a good sign...
Marty Slevin, Dublin, 4:31 PM 22/09/2011
5
A big consolation of last nights game is that a wins a win. Last season we were playing ok and getting nothing, this season we've been ok but been picking up points. Roy deffo looks a class act so thats also a deffo positive!
Paul, Sunny Bacup, 2:51 PM 22/09/2011
4
Don't be so negative. So depressing. Good win and we wern't that bad at all. Good win into last 16 and had a good start in the league
G Man, Town, 2:50 PM 22/09/2011
3
Miserable Bugger!!! Lighten up a bit and focus on the positives. At least we are winning and getting some points on the board - ok we havent played that well. But as in the last 3 seasons the second half is where the football seems to start.
Pablo G, Lpool, 2:19 PM 22/09/2011
2
How come when other clubs win and play awful, its the sign of a great team? but it isn't for Everton?
Stu, Wirral, 1:00 PM 22/09/2011
1
Hasn't anyone learnt... when we are expected to win we are awful and when we are expected to get beat we are awesome... wouldn't be surprised if we do City 2 - 1. Please God
Truffelini, Wirral , 12:54 PM 22/09/2011
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