Mickey Blue Eyes...
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Mickey Blue Eyes


I am reliably informed by my youngest family members that Louis Saha has been foolish enough to post a footy distress signal on what is euphemistically called "social media," a medium titled "Twitter." From my second hand information - I haven't even bothered to give it a cursory glance - it would seem the latter is appropriately named for its users: it sounds as though it uses attenuated language by and for attenuated brains. Why anybody should bother with that kind of muck is as baffling to me as the people who buy tabloid newspapers or watch unadulterated TV shit like X Factor, Coronation Street or East Enders. But you pays your money and you takes your (limited) choice. We have that kind of cheap society and there's no reason at all why football should be free of its scatty gossip and mind-numbing organised stupidity.


Louis, it seems, is deeply unhappy he didn't even make the bench for Saturday's game with Wigan. Moyesy apparently responded along the lines that it was tough luck for Louis and he would just have to live with it. So far, so ordinary. I don't blame either of them. There's no point being a professionally competitive athletic footballer if you aren't allowed to compete. If you don't feel pissed off at not being part of the action there's no blood in your veins. Equally, there's no point being a manager of anything unless you make strategic decisions to suit your own policies. In the end, right or wrong, there can be only one manager; Louis wouldn't be the first Everton player to discover you don't mess with Moyesy. No manager worth his cojones is going to be told what to do by a player, not even one as good as Louis. What matters of course is how all of this was communicated between the two, and only they can know the truth of it. Under normal circumstances the matter would be dealt with in the code of dressing room omertá....quite right, too, because the spat, like most spats, simply isn't that important.


However, these are not "normal" circumstances. Social media make it so, largely because they lack nuance and sensitivity and thus genuine understanding. They appeal only to the scatter-brained and fractious element of homo sapiens. More often than not they are little more than a refuge for the unhappy and disenfranchised, or just plain ill-willed or wilfully ignorant. That being the case, Louis really should have known better than to commit his private thoughts to the use of what is often little more than a sado-masochistic electronic mob. He has usually struck me as an intelligent and courageous man: how could it be otherwise given the course of his injury-ravaged career? Admirably, he took the blows and he got on with it, sometimes scoring goals and doing things that stretched his body beyond its limits. But time is catching up with him, as it does for everybody. Simply lashing out won't arrest it, anymore than it would help David Moyes rebuild his team. And we all know that is the stage Everton are at. A little more understanding from Louis wouldn't have been amiss.


Then again, we too need to exercise some understanding. Louis is unquestionably coming to the end of his first class career and it may be difficult for him to come to terms with it. For some it is more painful than others. Maybe that is why he lashed out. Maybe too Moyesy didn't handle it well - all informed Evertonians know he could be notoriously impatient and single minded, so perhaps he slipped back into old ways. If so, he should surely take a moment to look at himself and understand you can't always get away with mere determinism in management. Sometimes you need an almost superhuman level of judgment and empathy. Anybody who has had to manage or order other highly-motivated men will know what I mean.


I hope Moyesy and Louis patch up this nonsense because it doesn't help either of them or us or the team. I hope they respect each other's privacy and feelings as best they can. Both have done superlatively well for the club; it would be a pity to spoil it at the obvious conclusion of a liaison that has suited everybody since Louis arrived from Manchester United. None of us will forget his supreme moment, the fastest FA Cup Final goal, the first one at the new Wembley, or his other goals conjured from nothing. Our own lament is that we didn't have him sooner and for much longer.


In the end we are unlikely to ever know what really happened, and that doesn't bother this fan in the slightest. We can guess, and the worst of us can gossip, but none it will matter more than a basket of rotting carrots. Which is all "social media" and its mob mentality is worth anyway. The only thing more worthless is the cheap gossip manufactured by mainstream media.



Comments about Louis Lament
I may be missing the point, but I have read the Tweets. All they say is he is gutted not to be in the squad and good luck to the team. During the game he congrats the goal scorers. I really think the coverage of this particularly from the press is ridiculous. There is no story here.
Will, Southampton, 4:51 PM 19/09/2011
Twitter has some rubbish and it has some good stuff. It is surely too exteme a sentiment to condemn all Twitter users as attenuated. Come on MBE - get back to your customary eloquence and thoughtful argument. Don't mimic those who you often condemn for their sweeping, dogmatic, ill-thought out generalisations @macalex101
Macalex, London, 4:00 PM 19/09/2011
Is Blue Kipper not "Social Media" then?
Chris, Birkenhead, 1:13 PM 19/09/2011
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